While I was out for a walk yesterday, I got thinking. For at least 15 years, I've been thinking about, and working on, who I will become. And, who I am, of course. In any case, I've realized that I've written lists upon lists at different points in my life, with notes for myself - they're all full of the things I want to remember when I'm old. (Or, at least older.)
I'm sure some of them are floating around. I'm equally sure that I would want most of them destroyed. I have had differing opinions throughout my life, some of which I'm not sure I would still support by the time I'm older and wiser. Regardless, I held them dearly, and didn't waver until I had reason to move to something else.
The list always reflects life, in its current phase. Right now, I'm somewhere between.... there's an old country song (that came out when I was 9, according to Wiki),
Strawberry Wine, that describes it perfectly: caught somewhere between a woman and a child. Although, I'm older than 17, and haven't drifted away... I relate.
Sometimes, I feel stuck, sometimes I feel free... and sometimes, I wish I just felt something else. That's my life now. Soon enough, I'm sure it will be different. Until then, things are just weird.
In any case, my list of things to remember when I'm older...
- Don't become stagnant. Ever. No matter how much work it is, and how much it hurts, always keep moving. It doesn't always have to be fast. Heck, it doesn't always even have to make much progress, at all. Just keep moving. Physically, mentally, emotionally. The day you just stop is the day you die. (Whether or not you die physically is another story. But I will. not. stop. before I have to. Remember that, self. Please.)
- Remember what it's like when you're young. Keep track of these things, write them down, relate it to other things... don't forget who you are and where you came from, and what you thought and felt in your younger, more optimistic days.
- Encourage people who are young(er than you). They are the future. Don't be too hard on them, just because you've been battered up and beaten by life. Maybe they will succeed where you failed. Maybe they will make the same mistakes. Maybe they will show you something. Maybe you will discourage them, and ruin their lives. (Haha, just kidding on that part. Mostly.)
- Don't quit laughing, whether it's at yourself, or silly things. Just don't laugh at other people, unless they're laughing too. (Or it's something innocent that you can't help laughing at...)
- Don't think you have all the answers. You're wrong. And no one will appreciate your expertise.
- Remember that the more you know, the more you find out that you know nothing at all. Keep that in mind at all times.
- Learn from your mistakes and then move on!
- Don't expect your kids to turn out how you imagined. If you pictured you and your daughters being great friends as they become adults don't blame them when they don't want to hang out with you - and don't take it personally. Also: Look at yourself long and hard before you blame them for shortcomings. You're probably the root of the problem. (I don't plan on reproducing, so this hopefully won't be an issue... or if I do, I would probably adopt. There are enough problems in this world, without making my own. But, hey, accidents happen.)
- If you do have children of your own, don't refer to them as accidents. At least not to their faces.
- Learn something new, as often as you can.
- Don't be boring.
- Stay socially involved in something. Anything! If you don't have friends of some level or sort, it's probably your own fault.
- Do something that scares the crap out of you at least once every month or two.
- Help others, even if you think you can't, or they don't deserve it.
- Don't jump to conclusions about anyone, and especially not about younger generations. They might surprise you.
- Stay as flexible as you can, for as long as you can. In every sense of the word. The more you stretch, the stretchier you are...
- Have your things in order, so you don't shock anyone when you die. But also don't worry too much about everything being pristine. You can waste so much time, worrying about everything being spotless.
- If you're married, don't whine and nag. Also, don't sit around waiting for your husband to come do things for you, and then complain about not getting to do what you wanted, while you were waiting. Do what you want, and let him cook his own damn dinner. (But don't get angry if he does the same thing.)
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